Porn

Many people begin looking at porn casually but after a while end up addicted to porn and the associated highs our bodies experience, particularly if masturbation is involved.

What started as just a bit of fun can often become something that begins to control you. If this is something you are struggling with then you are not alone – many people struggle with this, men, women, young, old, married, unmarried, those who believe in a God and those who don’t. Many people struggle with this temptation because there are so many images or videos only a click away!

It would be great to chat with you about things that will help you to beat this porn addiction.

you are more than just a physical body, you also have feelings, emotions and a spiritual side to you. You really need to think about how to help the whole of you and not just your physical body. 

Why porn? 

It is good to think about why you do it and why you want to stop doing it. What is it that you feel you are missing that drives you to porn and masturbation, is there something you are trying to mask or cover up, something you are trying to run from?

Also we need to be clear about why we want to stop – what is motivating you to want to break free? Motivation is important in breaking free from being addicted to pornography – why do you want to be free? Are you just trying to stop for you? For someone else? For God? The stronger our motivation, and the more it isn’t just about us, the greater the power the motivation has.

How? Where? When?

Think about how you most often access the porn – is it on a phone, a laptop, TV?

Think about where and when? Is it normally at night when you are alone in your room?

Opportunities to say no

Next time the temptation hits you might have the best intention to say no but it is so easy to make one slip. Try and find ways to put more barriers between you and getting access to the porn – so that you have to lose the battle to temptation 4 or 5 times before you get to look at the porn.

Place extra steps in your way to give you more opportunities to say no to the temptation. e.g. Leave your laptop outside your bedroom at night, remove the battery and place it high up on something you need a chair to reach, write a note and tape it to the laptop, shut the laptop or phone down properly.

All of this would mean that if you are in your bedroom and you suddenly decided you wanted to look at porn you would have multiple opportunities to say no to the temptation. You would have to (1) go out and get the laptop (2) go and get a chair and take it to the battery (3) climb on the chair and retrieve the battery (4) place the battery into your laptop (5) move the note you taped to your laptop. That’s five extra opportunities to say no and not do it!

Win the battle earlier

If we fill our mind with things that increase our sexual appetite during the day then it is not surprising that we find it hard to say no to the temptation later. Be careful what you watch, what you read, what you look at, who you take a double look at when they pass you in the street. If we can win more of the small battles earlier in the day – we can win more battles later.

Think about the spiritual you

Do you believe there is a God? Have you ever spent time trying to learn about who Jesus is, what he did and why he did it?

When you believe that Jesus loves you and is deeply interested in you it gives you a different picture of the world around you and of what your life is all about. It gives you a new hope and a new focus outside of yourself.

The more you get to know the real Jesus of the Bible, the more you will want to live to make Him happy and this will also then become a great motivation to saying no to the thing you are addicted to.

Give yourself a new focus

Find something new to fill your free time, spend time with other people, start a new hobby, keep yourself busy, volunteer at something. Find new, rewarding things to do and people to make a difference to – the more the focus is moved away from you and onto others, or God, the better. 

Positive rewards